Wedding Wednesday: TODAY’S THE DAY!

Hell-OH. So there was no Wedding Wednesday last week. Boo hoo, I’m sure. As I mentioned, my laptop has gone to live on a farm upstate where he can run and play with his friends all the time so I’ve had a leetle trouble with le blogging. I almost panicked and came in early to work last week to blog but then I remembered that no one cares and I can just chill and it was, in all honesty, a great victory in the eternal battle of Rational Liz vs Crazy Liz so hoorah. The world spins on

Hokay, so, where were we? Oh yes! After 10 months,15 days and approximately 7 hours of waiting, planning, freaking, check-writing, blog-reading, manic arm-toning, and lots of love, August 16, 2014 had finally arrived. Ding a ling DING! The morning was dreamy – a cloudless blue sky, a light breeze and a complete lack of humidity betraying the lat summer date.

Wedding. Day. Was. HERE!!!

We’re almost to the good parts so I’ll do my best to just zip through the highlights of the first half of the day. Buckle up!

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After sleeping all the way until SEVEN AM I roused the gals out of bed and Mo, Kathleen, Marge and I popped across the street to the Lancaster Central Market  for a little brekkie. FUN FACT, Lancaster Central Market is the oldest continually operated indoor farmer’s market in America.

Serious claim to fame right there.

It’s actually an amazing market and I could spend hours going into further detail but that is not even remotely the point of this story. Maggie had purchased these Bride and Maid of Honor buttons for the bachelorette party and we both managed to a) not lose them and b) haul them all the way to Lanc for the wedding, so we pinned them on our tops for breakfast. (Bernie received that hat as a Christmas gift from her cute siblings and I have a feeling she’ll be tha-rilled with me for posting a photo of her in a baseball cap. I think she looks adorable!)

Our pins were just the flair we needed to be the belles of the market.  At every stand we visited, people asked when the wedding day was and we joyfully exclaimed “IT’S TODAY!!” At the coffee stand, two sweet ladies reminded me not to forget to eat and I took them up on their advice by rocking it over to the deli stand (holla S. Clyde Weaver!) where the other 3 gals got breakfast sammies like normal humans and I of course got a gigantor turkey sub…my very last hoagie as a single lady!!!

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(My brother cleverly pointed out that they’re no longer “ho”-gies but “Scott-gies.” Get it?! #zing.)

The women working the deli counter were hilarious and SO excited when they learned it was my wedding day. They literally whooped it up, clapping and cheering and causing a scene. I loved it!

They didn’t give us free breakfast, though. Whomp. But who am I kidding, my ‘maids (gross) bought my hoagie for me because it was MY DAY so I can’t really complain.

We raced our buns (double meaning for both butts and sandwiches) back across the street to the Marriott just in time to meet the hair and makeup team. Which was just two people but it sounds cool when you say you have a team, you know?

SO FANCY, YOU ALREADY KNOW:

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We gals had our hair and/or makeup done by two local women who came recommended via a girlfriend of mine who’d been married earlier in the year. They both do hair/makeup on the side, specializing in weddings and they were just great. G-R-E-A-T. Professional, friendly, efficient and way more affordable than salons, which (like basically all vendors) jack up their prices the second you say “wedding.” After the fiasco of my first trial, I would never find anyone (dramatic much?) but after meeting these two earlier in the summer, just totally hit it off. They are both GEMS.

If you’re a Lancaster area bride, holler at me on FB or email and I’ll send their info!

While we got our hair did we rocked it to a playlist curated by MOH Marge that consisted primarily of 90’s pop one-hit wonders (remember Evan and Jaron, you guys???), boy bands, Beyonce and Katy Perry – AKA all my favorite musicians – and sipped on mimosas dressed up all fanclylike for the occasion.

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Ensembles c/o my cute friend Leah!

Awesome as our team was, Bernie Beans decided to have her hair done at her regular salon, so she slipped out around 9 AM for her appointment. When it was approaching noon and she still hadn’t returned, I suspected something may be amiss…

“A LITTLE BIT ON” 

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(This is, unfortch, not the vehicle discussed in this story but IS a pretty solid representation of the driver…)

While we were getting gussied up, Brian went for a long run (of course he did) with his sister Emily, who is an amazing runner, his groomsman Brandon and my brother Michael. Apparently as they’re out and about jogging around  town Michael mentions that, after picking up the girls from the train station the night before, he may have left Bernie’s car…and I quote…”a little bit on.”

“A little bit on”? How does that work exactly, Michael?

Now I’m no motor head but I’m pretttttty sure that car batteries don’t run on a spectrum – they’re on or they’re off. There’s not really a middle ground.

We may never know the degree to which the car was left running but it was at the very least “a little bit” because when Bernice went out to drive to the hair salon the batter was a whole lot bit 100% dead.

Go team go!

My mom called my uncle, who drove her to the salon and back. We were sitting in the hotel suite waiting for her to come back when she called my sister’s cell phone, trying to get a hold of Michael. No one wanted to tell me what was going on because they didn’t want me to worry about it – apparently Kathleen had run into my mom in the lobby earlier and knew the whole time! – but the cat was out of the bag and Bernie was late to get her makeup done because she was with my uncle in the parking garage, trying to jump start her car.

It is a cliche that something will go wrong on your wedding day – but something you never could have expected or planned for. HELLO THAT THING!!!

I wasn’t worried, really, I was mostly just kind of mad because it was VERY IMPORTANT TO ME that we stick to the schedule for the day (shocking) and now everything was running late and why did the car have to be jump started this very moment? Was the car walking down the aisle at 5 PM THAT VERY EVENING. I don’t think so. It could sit and die in the parking garage for all of eternity for all I cared…it was MY DAY.

Mild exaggeration but barely.  I’m the worst.

Long story long, Michael came back (FINALLY, AMEN!) and helped my uncle jump start the car and Bernie got her makeup done and all was well and we were ready with hours to kill. HA!

SANDWICHES!

We ordered sandwiches! I had a chicken Cesar wrap! No point to this, just thought I’d mention it.

AH, SILKY SILKY NOW

I took a shower before breakfast but for some reason forgot to shave my legs, a fact I didn’t realize until after I’d had my makeup done, but before my hair. Yes, my dress was floor length but I figured I owed it to Brian not to roll into our wedding night with cactus thighs. He has the rest of his life to experience that hotness.

And so I found myself in full face, including false eyelashes squatting in the tub because I was afraid to turn on the shower head and ruin my makeup, frantically shaving my legs and, oh yes, bikini zone, on my wedding day.

Pro Tip To Mah Ladies: DON’T DO THIS.

DENIM ON DENIM

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The morning of the wedding, Maureen, Maggie, Kathleen and I all donned button down chambray shirts – totally unplanned! Adorbz, I know. Emily had spent the morning with the boys, crushing them in the 5K I’m sure, and then came to the suite for hair and lunch and girlie time. She didn’t have a chambray but luckily I had an extra, so I gave her mine.

“Now we’re sisters who share clothes!” she said.

Andddd I cried.

SISTERS!!!

This goofy denimy photo is one of my favorite from the day. Marge has the faux laugh on LOCK.

HEADS UP SEVEN UP 

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As I mentioned, I maybe could have cooled it just a pinch on being such a schedule monster, as we found ourselves fully styled and fed and made-up and defuzzed in our no-no zones with over an hour until the photographer was due to arrive. I was beginning to get a little antsy and, shall we say, snippy (my cousin Terianne knows what I mean…sorrrrrry TA!), so some genius angel suggested we relax by playing a game. And not just any game, but the greatest App creation of our time: Heads Up.

And so we ladies whiled down the last few hours of my single life Heads’ing it up. We didn’t keep score but let’s just go ahead and say my team won.

Because, and I’m not sure I mentioned this yet but, it was MY DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY.

KYLENE, ON THE SCENE

Poet, don’t know it, etc.

Suddenly it was 2:45 PM and the time had ARRIVED! Despite the fact we’d just spent the last hour chillaxin and maxin all cool, when our photographer arrived, everything was a blur. Hang the gown! Artfully lay out the earrings! Did someone pack my lipstick?

Bernie and Marge helped me into my dress.

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I slipped into my accessories.

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And checked myself out.

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The best part of a wedding day is how you can be just totally vain and into staring at yourself all day long. Why can’t life be like that all the time?! (Oh right, I don’t look that good all the time…)

Meanwhile, upstairs, Kylene’s second shooter Kathy was hanging with the boys as they mulled over a complex ironing situation.

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Fixed their ties.

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And pinned their boutonnieres.

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(Hi Angie!!!)

Then, with a champagne toast…

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And a final once-over in the mirror…

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It was GO time!

The gals stayed in the suite to get into their dresses, the boys did…what did they do?…and Brian and I set off into the sun for the big reveal! Our first moment together, on our WEDDING DAY! It was as meaningful and exciting and emotional as I’d imagine it to be but…I guess you’ll just have to wait until next week for the rest of that tale.

See you then!

xoxox Liz Scottgie

* PS: all photos c/o Kylene Lynne Photography except the champagne & heads up photos which are c/o Margepantaloons and the picture of Michael which is c/o his facebook page but I’m pretty sure I took it (?) and the shaving cream and sandwich which are obviously stock photos I found on the internet. Oh and the hoagie which is c/o me and the dumb selfie of me getting my hair-did, also c/o me. Basically the first half are c/o us amateurs and then all the gorgeous ones toward the end are profesh. You get it.

OK BYE!!!

One Awkward Month!

Brian and I have officially been married for one month! And, honestly, the only awkward thing is how earnestly cheesy and romantical I’ve become.

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I can’t even bring myself to type “barf.” Marriage is ruining me.

Kidding. Kidding. It’s the best ever.

Before I ramble on any further – and y’all know I’ll be a-ramblin’ – a quick note that all photos shared here today are from our professional photographer Kylene Lynn Photography. Kylene is amazing and I’d recommend her in a heartbeat to any Central PA brides-to-be (or grooms-to-be! #gendernorms). If you are going to share any of these in any way like pin them or I don’t know, email them to your grandma or whatever, please credit Kylene! NO I am not so vain as to actually think you’re going to like, create a whole magazine of my personal wedding photos but I don’t know how the internet works and just want to make sure I’m giving credit where credit is due!

OK I’m a psycho. MOVING ON!!

What have I learned in the month we’ve been married? Well! Did you know that during World War II the US Armed Forces trained a regiment to fight on skis in the traditional Alpine style? This skill was used but once and doesn’t actually seem to have been that successful but, the more you know!

I realize this has nothing to do with me, or with Brian, or with marriage but I learned it last week, post-wedding so…it counts?

To be honest, not much has changed in the day-to-day in the last month of our lives. We were already living together (whoops), had a joint checking account, and shared a closet. We’ve felt “married” for a long time and now it’s just legally binding. I’m sure I’ll have plenty of ladymag worthy insights on marriage in the months and years to come but for the past 30 days, I’ve just been enjoying the ride.

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It’s so much fun to call Brian my husband. I find any excuse to bring it up – on the phone with random work colleagues, in line at the grocery store, to my coffee cart guy. I especially like putting on a sort of character, the lovingly exasperated wife. This past week I was in a taxi at 6 PM on my way to meet Brian at the airport and my driver asked me what time my flight was.

“Oh, not until 9:15” I said. And then, with a knowing chuckle and a slight shake of the head, “But my husband loves to get to the airport hours early.”

Oh, that husband!

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Did I mention he’s a part time GQ model?! Like, seriously.

I also enjoy coming up with clever new nicknames playing off husband. I think hubby sounds so cheesy…we can do better. Some gems:

  • Husbo
  • Hubba Bubba
  • Hubarino
  • Hubble Telescope
  • Barney Hubble

and my personal favorite:

L. Ron Hubbard

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I crack myself up.

Honestly, if I have actually learned one thing in the month since we’ve been married, it is that I really, really and I mean REALLY like looking at photos of myself.

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Oh wait…I already knew that.

I actually think I look like a total goofball in that photo. I’m vain enough to admit I can work it with a grin but the smize? Niet zo much. America’s Next Top Model, I ain’t.

I have officially decided to change my last name, though I’m planning to continue using my maiden name at work. Though I’ve gone through zero of the legal steps to make this happen, it has been very fun to gradually transition into my new identity. Receiving birthday cards in the mail this week has been a hilarious example of my general confusion over the matter. I received cards addressed to: Mrs. Elizabeth Scott, Liz Scott (!!!), Elizabeth Hohenadel Scott and Elizabeth Hohenadel/Scott.

I think the Hohenadel – slash – Scott is my favorite and most accurately representing of my current state.

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Why pick one when I can just mix and match! Keep it fresh!

I am planning to do some little recaplets of some wedding business and by recaplets I really mean recap + whatever suffix means XXXXXXTRA long because, let’s be real here. I’m going to do these once a week on Wednesdays because Wedding Wednesday is alliterative and like any basic bitch, I love me some alliteration. Also, doing wedding posts once per week allows those who don’t care about weddings AT ALL to not read and those who ONLY care about weddings to only read those posts. And, most importantly, it helps me continue my previously stated goal of extending this JUST MARRIED attention as long and strong as I can.

Except this week I’m doing Wedding Tuesday because our anniversary is Tuesday and  twice per week is more than my lazy bones can handle. I guess I could do like…non alliterative wedding posts on Tuesdays from here on out but that’s just not as cute. Ugh, life is so hard sometimes. Am I overthinking this whole thing?

NEVER!

Ok so just one more gratuitous smooching shot…

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and, OK FINE a photo of the wedding party…

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and ALRIGHT ALRIIIIGHT, a hilarious dance scene…

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A little bit softer now!

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My brother is the best.

And I’m out of here. Stop begging me to post more wedding photos! I’m going to look like I’m obsessed with myself and my HUSBANDDDD or something! How embarrassing.

Blowing this exit, Liz. Shut it down.

xoxo M(r)s. Elizabeth Hohenadel / Scott