One Awkward Wedding: It Begins

Ok guys, get out your tulle and glue guns: it has begun.

(image via)

I’ve decided that I’ll write from time to time about wedding planning – to have a record of it, to mock it all, to keep myself sane. This is something I’d really, really like to do: I think it will be a unique and fun challenge for me to honestly and humorously portray the myriad of emotions and decisions that go into planning this special event , to look at “That One Perfect Day” © through the skewered lens of a real life Modern Bride.

Here’s the thing, though, much as I’d love to do this, I haven’t been able to start writing it out because I’m embarrassed. How ridiculous is that? I can’t help myself! Some horrible, mean voice inside me tells me that I’m being cheesy, that nobody cares, that “cool” girls shouldn’t allow themselves to get excited about things as antiquated and commercialized as weddings.

I know what you’re thinking: girrrrl, you cray.

And yet: here we are. I don’t know where it comes from, but I feel like there’s almost a dark flipside to the movements away from the Wedding Industrial Complex: in rebelling against the consumerism and conformity of all things wedding we’re being made cynical. That we’re not supposed to become giddy over flower arrangements and diamonds and card stock (OH the card stock!).  That we should be above it all.

There’s a very distinct possibility that I’m just overthinking things (for the first time EVER!) but tell me, do you know what I mean?

I’m worried that everyone will find me insufferable, insipid and boring. (You know, since I’m usually so intellectual and deep!) Here she goes again with the wedding talk! That I’ll become a caricature of some kind of bad Rom Com character or worse, the dreaded BRIDEZILLA. I constantly feel the need to apologize for bringing up our wedding in conversation, even with the closest of friends, because I don’t want to appear to be making too big a deal of it all.

All of this is entirely unfounded.  None of my married friends has ever once gotten on my nerves by talking about their weddings. Like, ever. If anything, it’s usually me bringing up the subject, begging to see photos and talk details. All of my friends have been over the moon excited for us – for our marriage and yes, our wedding – and if anything, blog traffic actually spiked when I talked engagements and diamond rings and yet I let that naggy, judgy voice in my head keep me from being truly enthusiastic.

I need to tell that voice to shut it. Posthaste.

There is nothing cheesy about being excited about your wedding. Are weddings overblown, expensive, outdated rituals? PROBABLY! But so is the Superbowl. And Thanksgiving. And people still get pretty fucking excited about those things. It is entirely possible to recognize that there is a difference between One Special Day and one special day. Wanting a long white dress and centerpieces is not selling out.  It is not anti-feminist. It is not lame.

So I’m going to stop apologizing and start celebrating. And writing! Not always, but now and again, always under the label One Awkward Wedding. And the rest of the time, I’ll focus on more important stuff like poop. And hard boiled eggs. And wine! And if people think I’m being stupid and self absorbed and annoying, well, they can skip those posts. And honestly I probably am being pretty stupid and self absorbed and annoying like, all of the time (incredibly vain, obsessed with Taylor Swift, no personal boundaries…yeah, sounds unappealing) but I think I’m actually OK with that.

Enough navel gazing. Let’s do this thing!

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23 thoughts on “One Awkward Wedding: It Begins

  1. Be excited, my friend! Everyone else is excited for you (and it makes me terribly sad to think you feel the need to hide your enthusiasm). You will have tons of content to work with, as the awkwardness in wedding planning is both endless and somewhat untapped, as far as blogging goes. To view it through your eyes is going to be awesome! Now get to writing.

  2. Oh I’m all for you talking about your planning so that in some way/shape/form you can to move on from the scarring that occurred almost 20 years ago (ACK! 20??) when the invitation that arrived at your house for my wedding excluded CHILDREN and you subsequently were not present. It’s not like it comes up at EVERY occasion we’ve since had, but most… no, actually it is every, and sometimes by me I admit. I want to see someone else become the crazy bridezilla that I was, and scream like an idiot from the middle of a formal garden for her “bridemaids!!” to attend to every little need. I’m thrilled for you and can’t wait to see this unfold. Please don’t disappoint. I need this. 😉

      • Excellent. NJ is on the way to PA… drop off at nana’s!!! so we’re not planning a vegas or islands destination wedding so that the festivities can be more about everyone’s need to escape from their boring lives? Are you including tours of the chocolate factory at least? a ride in a buggy? Do we get an amish sign for our house?? please tell me your bridesmaid will be wearing caps. I’m fired as wedding planner, right?… sigh.

  3. Whatchutalkinbout Willis? Only question NOT being excited about your wedding! Excited about One Special Day? You should be!

  4. Stop over-thinking. You’re among friends. And even if reading about wedding plans is not my thing, be sure to tag your posts with “POOP! EVERYWHERE POOP!” and I’ll come running…

  5. Girl, preach! I wanna hear every little annyoing detail, colors and horrible cakes and whatnot. We just got married at the courthouse… so much for details. So SPILL! 🙂

  6. Last night, after I read this, the wedding episode of 30 Rock came on. It TOTALLY reminded me of you when Liz says “They’re just a giant industry that preys on gender stereotypes to make adult women spend a ton of money and act like selfish children.” But at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what everyone else thinks – you’re going to have an awesome wedding and do things the way you want to on your day!

  7. Have you watched Engaged: The Invitation on u tube yet? If you haven’t, check it out. You will love it! Cheers to planning a wedding. It’s a hoot of a time! Just make sure to plan a honeymoon while you are at it!

  8. You go girl – I completely understand how you feel. I’m thankful that my wedding is so far away that I don’t actually have to start planning yet, because I really, really, don’t want to get all girly about it even though I would feel guilty about not seeming excited if I didn’t. Looking forward to your wedding planning posts so I can maybe start feeling less awkward about it too!

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